Playing With Fire
by XoShaee
Summary: Saxon's life is back on track. She's graduated college and she hasn't done drugs in 3 years. She seems to be making progress... until the Clown Prince of Gotham sees her inside of a night club. A series of unfortunate events sends her rushing in to his arms and a world of drugs, robbery, murder and a fight to secure territory. Eventually a PolyFic. HarleyxOCxJoker
1. Chapter 1

**A/N: I saw my main character as Nathalie Emmanuel and her sister as Louise Emmanuel.**

Music and smoke; they intertwined in the air as if one couldn't exist without the other, giving Saxon her nicotine fix without her ever needing to light a cigarette of her own. She had been dragged from her home by her younger sister, Sarai, to celebrate her third year of sobriety.

Saxon appreciated the sentiment. She honestly did. It wasn't often that someone's older sister stopped smoking pot and snorting a line of coke every morning before breakfast, but her sister's thought process was a little off. Saxon had quit doing drugs… and to celebrate her sister was taking her to a club. Not just any club, but a club on the south side, where she could easily get a fix if she really wanted to… not that she wanted to of course.

She'd slightly brushed her rather large, curly black hair and applied a little eyeliner over the ambiguous looking skin she could thank her lovely mother for. She'd pulled on a red dress with matching heels and let her sister take her out despite her slight reservations.

The two of them were close, extremely so, and Saxon would never pass up a chance to spend time with Sarai. They hadn't spent as much time together as they both would have liked. Saxon was beginning an accounting job at a firm and Sarai was getting her degree in Addiction Studies .in a semester. They were aware that their lives were taking them in different directions, not because there was anything drastic going on with their lives, but simply because their respective homes were on separate sides of the city and work and school were both proving to be demanding.

Their entire family was close. Their mother wrote for the newspaper while their father worked for the hospital. They were the proud parents of three children: Sabastian, Saxon and Sarai, in order from eldest to youngest.

Sabastian was a boxer, a pretty good one at that and was in the process of traveling and continuing to be undefeated. They didn't see much of him either.

She took in her younger sister as Sarai danced in front of her, a beer in one hand and the other raised in the air. She wasn't drunk, not in the slightest and Saxon was beyond amused to say the least at the way Sarai was gyrating her hips.

Saxon was seated at the bar, her legs crossed at the ankle, a drink in her hand. She moved her head slightly with the beat. Dancing was not her forte. She laughed anyway when her sister fell in to her purposely and set her drink on the bar.

"Why are you not having fun?" Sarai hugged her sister around the neck and Saxon laughed.

Her sister was not drunk, no, but tipsy she may have been.

"I am having fun," she argued.

"You are three years clean. You've just gotten a bachelors in accounting and you have a pretty amazing man on your arm."

"Jared is not my man," Saxon clarified, taking a drink from her cup.

Sarai laughed.

"Is that all you got from what I said?"

"No," Saxon chuckled, "No," she repeated, "and I appreciate you dragging me out of my hermit hole, but I don't dance. I've never danced."

"You're dancing," Sarai shrugged and plucked the glass out of her sister's hand.

She reached over and set it on the bar before standing up straight and grabbing Sarai's hands in hers and pulling her up. Saxon groaned, but didn't necessarily fight the way her sister pulled her through the crowd and to the dance floor.

X

J stood on the second floor of his club, leaned forward on the railing. The top floor was a circle, allowing anyone on it the ability to look down the center and see what the people on the lower floor was doing; a donut of sort. He had been standing there for a while. He wasn't sure how long exactly. He had come to his club in order to meet with someone about a business deal. He always met on his own turf. It was easier. It was safer. It was closer to home and allowed him the privilege to do whatever the hell he wanted.

Black Mask was moving against him and he needed to suffocate the little flame of hope he had before it turned in to a full blown out wildfire. Eventually he was going to have to kill him, but the more time he had him alive, the better. He didn't need a full-fledged war on his hands.

While the lower floor of his club was more of a bar feel with a dancefloor that took up a majority of the space and a few small tables hugging the walls, the upper floor was more of a calm feel. It was made up of several different areas that were available for purchase, where J knew for a fact people took meeting. Waiters ran around the upper floor bringing drinks to the different tables and the dancing done there was different. It wasn't a large group of people dancing. It was more of a woman atop a table in the center of each booth. J was quite proud of his place. He'd built it up on his own and the best part is, it was perfectly legal. It was the constant flow of cash that allowed him to research whatever new gadget he felt he wanted. It was the income that allowed him to get private planes and pay off people that needed to be paid off. He had a few other ventures, two restaurants scatter around the city, and Harley's little makeup line, but this club was his baby. It was his best accomplishment… after Harleen of course.

He scanned the crowd again and he noticed her for the third time since her entrance, the little short girl with the curly hair. She peaked his interest and that in itself said enough.

He ran a hand through his slicked back green hair and he whistled, three short whistles. The girl he was looking at was walking through the crowd, being dragged along by the same person she'd entered with.

J rested his elbows on the railing and he felt Harley closing in on him before he saw her. She stood beside him and looked out over the crowd.

"Puddin?" she checked and J turned his head to take her in.

Her hair was plain blonde and he would have been shocked if he didn't know that was going to dye it as soon as she got the chance. She was wearing a glittery silver dress with heels on that were just as shiny. Even her makeup seemed holographic and he resisted the urge to roll his eyes. She was like a child… but she was who she was and she had been around him long enough to get under his skin whether he wanted to admit it or not.

Harley was a nuisance, but she was his nuisance and he would kill any person that said otherwise. She had made herself an asset to his life and he both loved and hated her for it, one more than the other. He didn't understand how she had decided to stand beside him and do whatever it was he needed. He didn't understand where she got the nerve to make herself a fixture in his life.

He watched her run her tongue over her bright red lipstick. He plucked a glass from the tray of a waiter walking by and then turned back towards the railing gesturing with his glass.

"Do you see that girl?" he took a drink from his glass, "in the center, red dress, short curly hair."

Harley stood still, her arms crossed over her chest. Her eyes darted over everyone in attendance.

"Yup," she said finally.

"Herd her to me, will you dollface?"

"Sure," Harley shrugged and took J's glass, tilting her head back and drinking the rest quickly.

She turned, a surprisingly graceful move considering the height of her heels and started towards the stairs, setting the glass on a random table as she walked, sashaying her hips as she went.

J licked his lips as he watched Harley dance in to the bustling crowd. She was blending in extremely well. He chalked it up to the fact that her hair wasn't dyed and he turned away from the railing and started his own trek toward the staircase.

X

Saxon moved a little, side to side, to the beat as her sister twirled in a circle, her arms above her head. She was barely doing anything and she was sure that she was sweating. She was not a fan of clubs… at least not sober anyway. She tried to get in to the rhythm of the music. She tried to let the beat wash over her. She closed her eyes, and moved a little more. She closed her eyes and she caught the beat. She owed it to herself to at least actively try to unwind and have fun. She found herself dancing with a little more enthusiasm and when she opened her eyes there was no Sarai to speak of.

Saxon scanned the crowd and saw her, at the bar, leaning over it and talking to the bartender and she rolled her eyes. But, that was Sarai, always the social butterfly. Saxon didn't chase after her. She continued to dance idly, in a mass of people that could care less if she was on beat or not.

She started to feel as if she was being closed in, the area between her and everyone else getting significantly smaller. A blonde girl in tall silver heels spun and then began to move her entire body as if she was belly dancer and Saxon took a step back as she continued her own dancing. The girl shouted woo and did a similar move again and Saxon took yet another step back and then cursed when she ran in to someone. She spun around an apology already on her lips and it instantly died when her eyes landed on electric green hair. She looked over her shoulder. No one else in the crowd seemed to notice and the blonde girl was instantly gone.

"I'm sorry," Saxon said instantly, "Sorry," she repeated.

She watched him, look down at the bottom of his white shirt where a small amount of his red drink had splashed when she'd carelessly backed in to him.

"Don't worry about it," he switched his drink to the other hand and wiped the wet one on his black pants.

"I'm really sorry," Saxon said it one more time, just for her own sanity and he looked up from his shirt and at her and she instantly shut her mouth.

"Don't say you're sorry again," he snapped, "Are you always such a swell speaker, sweetheart?"

"Yes," Saxon was almost defensive, "Nothing is wrong with my speaking skills, but you're," she gestured towards him and took a partial step back, "You're the- the."

"The Joker," he finished with a bored tone.

He tilted his head back and finished his drink letting his arm fall to his side with the glass still held in his clutches. Saxon was very aware of the way he was looked her up and down and she partially wanted to pull her dress down.

She was face to face with Killer Clown of Gotham for heaven's sake.

"You would be correct," a grin crossed his face, his silver teeth being hit by the strobe lights of the club as he took a step towards her and Saxon found herself unable to move out of pure fear, "And you are?"

"Saxon," she blurted.

He was crazy. She knew that he was crazy and she knew that he was unpredictable. She knew that he killed people. If he asked her a question she was going to answer it.

"From Gotham?"

"From Gotham," she nodded once,

"What do you do for a living?"

"Accounting."

"Accounting huh?" J stored that away for later.

"Do you want something from me?" Saxon decided the straightforward approach was the best.

"You," he took another step towards her and she realized there was no where for her to go, closed in between him and everyone else.

She took him in, really took him in. She noted his tangled electric green hair and extremely red lips. She took in his skin that was so pale it almost looked translucent beneath the lights of the club. Stray tattoos peaked out from the collar of his shirt and his eerie blue eyes made her feel like he could see directly in to her soul. She took a deep shaky breath. He was looking at her in a way that made her stomach knot.

He grabbed her chin in his free hand and he leaned down and in to her.

"Relax," he smiled, a bright smile that allowed her to see all of the silver in his mouth, cap after cap after cap, "I just want to pick at your brain, sweetheart."

He wasn't lying. It had been a while since he'd just been drawn to someone, the last person being Harley.

Saxon opened her mouth and then closed it again. She had no idea what to say to that. She caught sight of her sister making a beeline towards her out of the corner of her eyes and made a split decision. She pretended to get pushed from behind and crashed in to the Joker causing his glass to shatter to the ground. He looked down and Saxon shook her head sideways at her sister as quickly as she could while his gaze wasn't burning through her soul.

"I don't know what's wrong with me," she blurted, "I- I'm not usually this horrible at… existing," Saxon scoffed.

"Horrible at existing, huh?" J shook his foot and the glass atop of it caught his eye, "Aren't we all?"

X

Sarai headed towards the stairs at the far end of the club, still holding the two drinks in her hand. She set one of them down on the floor, against the wall discreetly and made her way behind the stair case. She looked around the building at the array of people dancing, laughing and drinking. No one seemed to be looking at her. She licked her lips and then pulled the fire alarm and quickly walked away, tilting her glass to her mouth and stepping in to the array of guest that were now making their way towards the exit.

X

The sprinklers came to life and water fell upon J like the screams of his unsuspecting guest. He clenched his teeth and he looked around the building, his eyes immediately going to one of the five places he knew fire alarms to be. He scanned the five areas quickly before turning back to… no one. He clenched his fist. She was smart. He had to give her that much. She'd ducked in to the crowd as soon as he'd turned his head.

He felt two hands land on each of his shoulders and they slid from his shoulders, down to his chest.

"What happened with that cute little thing you were talking to?" Harley kissed him right beneath his ear.

"She vanished," J said simply.

"The one that got away," Harley sighed.

"They never get away," he said dryly.

And then he titled his head back and he laughed, a laugh that sent chills straight up spines.


	2. Chapter 2

Saxon took a drink out of her water bottle and hopped over a box on her way from the kitchen to her couch, her house phone to her ear.

She had gone to the club with Sarai a full two weeks prior and she still felt like she was being watched.

She had started her first 'big girl' job and had moved off of campus and in to a place of her own. The place wasn't much really, but it was nice enough. It was a simple one bedroom and one bathroom apartment. Her parents had offered to let her move back home, but she had hastily declined. After living on campus for five years, there was no going back home. She had gotten a taste of freedom and wasn't looking back. They'd told her that moving back home would help her stay clean. They were very much mistaken. Going back home would probably drive her to use again. She loved her parents. They were dear to her and she would do anything for them, but they were her parents and they acted as such. She would be 23 with no freedom to speak of. They would want to know her whereabouts each time she wasn't home and they'd want her home by a certain time. Saxon wasn't partying. She hadn't partied in quite some time actually, but she did enjoy having the option.

"He climbed out of the ring and threw up," Sabastian was saying.

Saxon pushed one of her boxes out of the way with her foot and set her water bottle down on her clustered coffee table before collapsing on to the couch.

"That's disgusting, Bash," Saxon reached for a box and began to rip the tape off of it.

"Maybe, but I won and am still undefeated," Sabastian said proudly.

"I am super proud of you," she smiled automatically.

"Thank you, thank you. I would be more than willing to sign an autograph for you," he chuckled. His sister scoffed.

"You wish I wanted your autograph."

"Yeah, yeah," Bash laughed, "So, what's up with you and this accounting firm? Do you like it?"

"It's okay," Saxon opened the box before her completely and took in the content.

"Just okay?"

"Just okay," she repeated back at him.

"If you aren't happy, quit."

"I just started," Saxon reminded, standing up and picking up a picture frame from the box she'd just opened, "Besides, I didn't go to college for five years to not use my degree."

"There's always something to do," Bash countered, "I have a degree in Computer Information Systems and I punch people for a living."

"Well, we aren't all so fortunate, Bash," Saxon placed her picture frame on her entertainment center.

"Right," he sighed, "How's the new place?"

"It's great. I'm in the process of decorating and unpacking," she headed back to her box, dragging a large trash bag with her.

"Sounds… horrible."

"It is," she admitted.

They both laughed.

"Are you really okay?"

Saxon paused in her living room and she took a deep breath. She looked around at her crowded area, boxes littering the floor.

"Yes," she decided.

"Do you need money, Saxon?" his voice got serious.

"No," she said immediately, "I saved up from waitressing and our parents paid my way through school so working for three years and barely having bills I definitely have enough money to last a few months," she knelt on her floor and began to throw trash in to the trash bag, "and my stocks are doing significantly well. What kind of accountant would I be if I couldn't manage my own money?"

"A crappy one," Bash said without thought, "but even if you're the worse damn accountant to ever exist in Gotham, you're still my sister and I'll take care of you if you need."

"I'm fine."

"Okay," he took a breath, "How's Sarai?"

"She's doing wonderful, Bash. She's taken up smoking recently which is just disgusting, but she's overall happy and healthy."

"And how's mom and dad?"

Saxon stood back up and took in her clean coffee table. She moved to one of her end tables.

"You would know if you called them," she slid all of the discarded tape and random papers in to the trash bag.

"Don't," he chuckled, "Don't do that."

"Dad is great," Saxon said reaching over her end table to plug her lamp in to the wall, "Mom is okay. She misses you. You should come around more often."

"Yeah, I know."

Saxon stood up again and sighed.

"Promise?"

"Yes," he said lightly, "and I'll even kick your boyfriend's ass."

"I don't have a-"

Saxon heard a door close and paused. She tilted her head to the side.

"Saxon?" her brother called.

"Yeah, Bash, I'm here."

"You were just about to lie to me," he reminded.

"Right," Saxon heard a sound again and paused, "I think I hear someone moving around."

"In your apartment?" he asked slowly.

"Yes."

"Saxon-"

"I'm probably being dramatic," she tried to convince him and herself, "Just stay on the phone for a little longer," she stood up and walked to her bedroom door, "and call mom and dad this week," she attempted to distract him before she pushed the door open, hit the lights and paused.

Nothing.

"I will. Eventually."

"At least call once."

Saxon backed out of the room and headed to the next. She kicked the door open, turned on the lights and looked in and around. Nothing.

"Yes ma'am."

"Thanks," Saxon walked towards her bathroom and pushed the door open.

She turned on the lights and looked around. She walked in and took a deep breath, looking at her reflection. She was wound too tight.

"Yup," Sabastian yawned.

"You should get some sleep. I was being dramatic and there is no one in my house," Saxon turned away from her mirror and paused.

"Okay. I love you, kid. Goodnight."

"I love you too," Saxon walked slowly out of her bathroom and looked both ways down her hall.

A silhouette. She could have sworn she'd just seen someone run by. She heard Sabastian hang up and she walked towards her kitchen, quickly, quietly. She turned the corner and then cursed. The window over her kitchen sink was open, stray leaves blowing in to her home through it. She walked quickly over to the window and leaned over the sink to shut it. She locked the window and then stood in her kitchen and looked around. She had turned on nearly every light in her apartment and there was still no intruder to speak of.

She pushed her hair back and took a deep breath. She was hallucinating. She shook her head, as if to clear it. She didn't need to finish packing. She just needed to go to sleep. That was what the issue was. She just needed sleep.

Saxon looked around again and then she dragged her exhausted body to bed.

X

J sat comfortably in his office, his feet on his desk beside Harley Q, who was sitting completely on top of it, her legs criss-crossed. He had a Rubik's Cube in his hand and he was more interested in the stupid thing then he was the man speaking in front of him. He had been working on it for a little more than 10 minutes and he already wanted to throw the damned thing and hit Harley in the back of her head. She was the one who had mixed the colors together after all. He grit his teeth and he focused.

"J," the man in front of him said softly, "are you listening?"

"Yes," J sighed and continued to work on his Rubik's Cube, "Black Mask wants war," he sighed, "How unfortunate."

A smile spread over his face and his hands started to move faster. He'd seen the pattern. He worked through the rest of his cube quickly and then threw it in the air. Harley caught it and began to mess up the perfectly presentable thing as J slid his feet off of his desk and stood up.

"Hugo Strange will probably side with him," J scoffed, "and Bane."

"And two face," Harley said never looking up, "You did burn half of his face off."

"You're right, cupcake," J smoothed her hair back, "And who are we looking at on our side again?"

"Scarecrow, Riddler, and Red," Harley looked up and set the cube on the desk, "Deadshot's relocated with his daughter and Diablo went back under the grid. I may be able to get Boomerang if you really want him."

"Not in the slightest," J rolled his eyes, "So, we have two of your friends and two of mine," J scratched his head as he looked around his office, "because you are on our side, aren't you Croc?"

"Yeah, yeah," Killer Croc waved him off, "but there are wild cards that can affect the outcome of this if you were to go to war, sir," he said adjusting his stance.

J took him in. Killer Croc was one loyal man. He had a skin disease that made it look like he had reptile skin and Harley Quinn had adored him at first sight. That was why he was around. He doted on Harley and the kid had no work ethic. He was large and he was strong and fast. He could have done a lot of stuff. He didn't. He simply existed. So, J had done the smart thing. It was no hidden secret that Killer Croc adored Harley. J had used that to his advantage. He'd used Harley as his way to meet with KC and then he'd given Killer Croc a home with him and Harley and he'd trained him to harness his strength. KC, who didn't have many people being nice to him had appreciated the gesture and J had gotten one loyal and powerful henchman over time.

"Of course," J walked around his desk, "The Penguin and who else?"

"Victor Fries."

"Freezy?" J chuckled, "Right."

"And Talia al Ghul."

J's smirk died down slightly.

"She's in charge of a variety of hitmen," KC continued, "And-"

"I'll take care of it," Harley stretched her arms above her head and then stretched her legs out in front of her, "Red and me will have a lil talk with her about girl power and it'll all be taken care of, puddin," she slid off of his desk and flipped her freshly died hair over her shoulders.

J closed in on her and he grabbed her chin roughly in one of his hands.

"Are you sure you can handle this?" he pulled her face closer and Harley smirked.

"Of course."

"Don't mess this up, Harleen," he dragged her name out and then raked his nails down her cheeks and chin so hard he was surprised blood didn't draw."

"You worry too much," Harley pushed his hands away from her with one of her own and winked at him before turning on her heels and heading towards his office door, bumping KC with her hip as she went.

J bit his bottom lip, picked up the discard Rubik's cube and then leaned backwards against his desk.

"Anything else?" he grumbled and then stood up and spun around when his office phone rung, "Hold that thought," he pushed the speaker button and hopped over his desk to collapse in to his desk chair, "What?"

"I have that information you asked about."

J recognized the voice at once and he smiled, a wide smile that stretched across his face as he began to unwind his Rubik's Cube.

"Penguin," he sang the name, "Just the man I've been needing to talk to."

"I bet," the Penguin grunted, "The girls name is Saxon Robinson, 23. She works at some little firm as of a week or so ago doing desk work. She graduated from college after 5 years, but it gets better. Your girl is a junkie. She was checked in to rehab for her extensive use of cocaine 3 years ago."

"Hm," J hummed and scotted closer to his desk, "What else do you have?"

"She's one of three kids. Her older brother, Sabastian 'Bash' Robinson is a boxer. He's 26. She has a younger sister too, Sarai Robinson, 21 years old and still in school. Her parents are both still alive. She doesn't have any pets or allergies to speak of, but she has what people would assume to be her boyfriend. The kid's name is Jared and he's 25. He graduated with a degree in mechanical engineering. His dad is a doctor, no mom. He's her parent's husband of choice."

"I heard her say something about owning stocks last night too. Find out what company she's buying through and if she has a stock broker put me in contact with them too, will ya?"

"Sure J," Penguin scoffed, "and anything else I thought you might need will be on the paperwork I'm about to fax you."

"Sounds like you're sweet talking me," J cooed, "Be here for a card game tomorrow, huh?"

"Yeah, yeah."

"And your money is being deposited now," J looked up and at KC, giving him a signal.

KC pulled a phone out of his pocket and he began to type away on it. A small ding echoed and J nodded at that.

"I've got it," the Penguin said quietly, "Good doing business with you."

"I have two more questions before you go."

"What's up, J?"

"Was it just cocaine?" J strummed his finger on his desk, "And where is good ole Bash located?"

X

Saxon collapsed at a small table. She was supposed to be getting a quick smoothie with Jared. He was not her boyfriend. He was her friend. She was so used to repeating that, that she almost thought it automatically when people said his name. She stretched her legs out beneath the small table. She had gotten her hair in to a neat donut atop her head and she had forced herself in to a beige pencil skirt and white button down top with matching white heels. She hated it. She hated it so much. The pearls around her neck made her feel as if she were chocking and the pearls in her ears made the back of her ears itch. She knew that she was being dramatic and that it was a mind thing, but she hated being dressed up. She hated being forced to pull all of her hair up and to wear jewelry. She was not a person that enjoyed earrings. She hated them. Her first day of work she had, re-pierced her ears herself when she'd attempted to put in pearls and had found the holes in her ears completely closed.

She strummed her fingers on the table in front of her and then pulled out her phone absently so that her idle hands had something to do. She pulled up a game and she worked on that. She knew Jared was not someone who was typically on time. It was one of his very few character flaws and she had accepted that. She sat back in her chair and she crushed candy, a guilty pleasure of hers that she knew she needed to get together. She had an extremely addictive personality. She did everything in extremes. She had been attempting to channel her addictive personality in to work and decorating her new apartment and anything else productive that she could think of, but she caved sometimes and crushing candy wasn't the worse thing she could consider a guilty pleasure. That was what she told herself anyway.

She didn't look up when Jared sat down. She finished her level in complete silence and then set her phone face down.

"Sorry," she took a deep breath as she looked up… and paused.

"It's okay. I've got all the time in the world, tuts."

Saxon looked around the smoothie place and then back in front of her. That was not Jared. No, not at all. He sat before her, a plain black hat on, all of his hair tucked beneath it and a pair of reflective shades over his eyes. He leaned forward placing his elbows on the table, in his plain black shirt and light blue jeans and he reached up and lowered his shades down his nose. Saxon took a quick breath and J winked at her before pushing his shades back up.

She made a move to stand.

"Uh, uh, uh," J reached across the table and grabbed one of her hands in his, "I've gone through all this trouble to not cause a scene and I'd hate for you to just ruin that," he ran his thumb over the back of her hand, "besides," he used his free hand to lift his shirt slightly, "We're just two people having a conversation. I'd hate to have turn this in to a kidnapping."

Saxon looked down at his concealed gun and she sat back down, crossing her legs at the ankle.

"Right," she said stiffly.

"Good girl," he let her hand go, "We wouldn't want everyone running to the exit, now would we?" he smirked at her, "A little deja vu."

"Of course not," Saxon placed her hands on the table, "and I have no idea what you're talking about."

"Right," J nodded once, "Well, our security footage says differently."

Saxon swallowed and licked her lips. She looked around the small shop and she leaned forward.

"What do you want from me?"

"I don't know yet," J admitted, "but you interest me," he strummed his fingers on the table.

"I don't know why."

"Neither do I, dollface, but we're going to figure it out," J took in his surroundings, "Tell me about your boyfriend," he leaned his face on one hand as if a friend preparing for a story and Saxon scoffed.

"I don't have a boyfriend."

"Tell me about Jared," he clarified.

Saxon was sure her face drained of color and her stomach fell. He knew about Jared just like he knew she would be here. She wasn't sure what to say. He had looked in to her. She didn't know if she should have been worried or not.

"He's a friend of the family," Saxon said carefully, "We've known each other for years," she shrugged, "There's nothing really to tell. I consider him my best friend. He was there for me through a lot of stuff and everyone just believes we should be together."

"Rehab?" J asked, "He was there for you while you were getting clean?"

"Excuse me?"

J laughed, a soft chuckle that put Saxon on edge just because it was so out of his character.

"Dark time in your life, huh?" he grinned.

"Yeah," she said simply.

There was no point in lying. He'd probably already gone through her medical history. He wouldn't have brought it up if he didn't already know the answer.

"Accounting," he said the world slowly, as if in thought, "Maybe you can help me and I can help you, huh?" he looked at her and smiled, and Saxon was sure she needed to throw up and he looked at his watch, "I'll be in touch," he pushed his chair backwards and stood up, "If you need anything let me know."

J removed his shades and Saxon looked up at him. His eyes held her still. She wasn't sure how he did that, but she was sure that her heart was hammering in her chest and he held her gaze as his hand moved on the table.

When he tapped the table and Saxon looked down her eyes bulged.

X

J took her in, stray strands of her hair framing her face as she looked down.

He didn't have an accountant. There was no one he trusted more with his money than himself, but Saxon was looking promising. He had a plan that he had already set in motion. It would take him two months to get Saxon right where he wanted her. That was it. He enjoyed being the Clown Prince of Gotham. He enjoyed it quite a lot actually, but he was not stupid. He was extremely smart actually, and he changed with the days. He had no emotional connection that caused him to be one set way. He could be a business tycoon one day and a maniac running through his mansion naked the next if he wanted. He changed his personalities the way Harley changed her hair and he would pluck just the right personalities to get sweet little Saxon right where he wanted her.

"I look forward to working with you," J said simply and he watched Saxon not lift her head.

Her eyes were glued on the Joker card he'd left on the table for her, one of his numbers scribbled on the bottom and a pill of Rush sat directly on the "O". He was sure she was sweating and she tucked her hair behind her ears and took a shaky breath. He watched her battle with herself on what to do with it, the rush and he almost scoffed. She was still a drug addict.

"I look forward to working with you," J repeated slowly and he watched Saxon shake herself free of her own thoughts.

"Working with me?" Saxon's gaze remained on the table.

"You work for me now, dollface," he put his pointer finger on the pill and slid it away from her before plucking it up and flicking it in to the air.

He tilted his head back and caught it in his mouth and then he raised his shades and winked at her distraught face before spinning on his heels and heading back out of the smoothie shop.

He spit the pill out the second he stepped foot off of the curb and snatched off his hat and shades as he walked to his waiting car. As much as he enjoyed messing with sweet little Saxon, he had actual work to be done.


	3. Chapter 3

Saxon went to the gym. She texted Jared that today was just not a good day for her and she went to gym and she ran. She ran as if her life depended on it, because she was sure that one day that may be the case… one day soon. She wasn't sure what the hell had happened to her life. She was more upset with herself than J and that made absolutely no sense. She shouldn't have been on that side of town at all. She definitely shouldn't have been in his club… and now, now he was 'interested in her' whatever the hell that meant. She closed her eyes briefly and then she pushed herself harder. She let Three Days Grace blare through her headphones and she focused on her breathing instead of the shit show her life was turning in to.

If he knew about Jared and her drug addiction he had to know about everything else. He had to know about Sarai and Sabastian and her parents. He had to. She refused to believe that he didn't. Her legs started to acquire the itch that came with exercise leading up to her threshold and she found the inner will to hold her pace. She felt her lungs begin to burn. She knew once she hit the mile, her body would get back in to a slight balance. The first 15 minutes were always the worst.

She closed her eyes as she ran. She had been so close to caving. She couldn't believe that she had been that close. She had been a few minutes from throwing 3 years of sobriety down the drain. She had been so close to throwing away everything she had been working towards. She had almost thrown her future away. J was fucking with her and what was there for her to do about it? Nothing. Absolutely nothing.

He was crazy. And he had killed people. He had definitely killed people. And he knew about her addiction and the people that she cared about the most. She was basically at his mercy. But, she couldn't think of what he'd want from her. She had nothing to offer. Her family was comfortable, but not rich. She wasn't in excellent shape. She wasn't particularly pretty or smart or… useful… but, he wanted something. Something.

Saxon stopped the treadmill and spun around, her heart dropping in to her stomach, when someone jerked one of her headphones out of her ears.

She paused and she took him in, Jared in all his glory, a pair of athletic shorts and a dry fit shirt on, his shaggy black hair a curly mess atop of his head.

"Are you serious?" he grunted.

Saxon walked off of the treadmill, grabbing her water as she went.

"What?" she started towards the water fountain and Jared followed after her,

"You canceled on me 10 minutes after our meetup time."

"I wouldn't have been able to if you were on time."

"Cute," he fell in stride with her, "but not funny."

"I don't know," Saxon shrugged, "I think I'm pretty hilarious."

"I bet," he chuckled, "You okay?"

"Yeah," she paused in front of the water fountain, "Why?" she began to unscrew the top.

"You seem on edge," he shrugged, "And you, Saxon Robinson, are at the gym."

"Are you trying to say I'm out of shape?" she filled her water bottle up.

"I'm trying to say you don't typically work out unless you're upset."

"Don't act like you know me that well," she smirked.

"Don't act like I don't," he snatched her bottle out of her hand and took a drink out of it with his left hand, throwing the right one of her shoulders.

Saxon scoffed and snatched her bottle back.

"Work has me stressed out," she lied.

"Damn," he started to lead her through the gym, "Already?"

"Already," she nodded once.

"Well, look. You should go home, take a shower and ignore your emails. And I will pick up food and come over and we can watch one of your stupid shows. I'll even put some of your shit up on the walls and any of the furniture you haven't finished yet."

"Jared, I'm not in the mood to-"

"I'll see you in a hour," he let his arm fall and started to walk backwards while holding her gaze, "Don't mess with me, Saxon. I already know where you stay and I'm not above breaking and entering."

She rolled her eyes and Jared thumbed her on the forehead, before heading in the opposite direction. She cursed under her breath. She knew that he was serious.

That was the type of person he was. He was pushy and loud and friendly. The man was whatever the hell the male version of a social butterfly was. He was her complete opposite… and that was why they matched. He was the person that would drag her in to social settings He had gone to every damn dance with her since she could remember. He had been her voice of reason and her best friend and he had always picked her up and pushed her forward even when the halls and held whispers of her being a lesbian.

They had met her freshman year of high school, his junior year. She'd been an outcast and the word lesbian had been branded in to her forehead seemingly and not one person disliked her for it actually, but she didn't have the energy to attempt to be friends with people that would ask her a million and one questions about her sexuality when she didn't want friends in the first place. Saxon wasn't a fan of people. She had siblings and they were all the friends that she needed… until she met Jared, at a high school party, taking shots back like they were water.

She'd noticed him, sure, but it wasn't until a week later that he'd walked over and sat right in front of her at the lunch table and introduced himself. He'd become a fixture in her life just like that. Not because she was drawn to him, but because he was persistent. He ran in to her in the halls and he was one of those people that could just walk up to you and begin talking a thousand words a minute and Saxon had appreciated that. It meant that she didn't have to talk very much.

It was a full semester before she heard the first rumor that he was gay, which she, of course, ignored. They were the same group of people that swore she was a lesbian and that knowledge alone made Saxon be less standoffish when it came to him and eventually she got used to his presence at the lunch table. He would wave his other friends off so that just the two of them could eat lunch and they became close.

They had once been in love.

They had been in a love that was… strange.

They were an odd couple. She was the girl that wore cargo shorts and plain black shirts every chance that she got. She was one of those girls that hated her hair touching her face and would shove it all under a cap and chewed on her nails and made sure that whatever brand her tennis were matched her socks and her under armor. She wasn't a lesbian. She was comfortable and she didn't understand how hating dresses and nail polish had anything to do with her sexual orientation but people were dense and she didn't have the time or energy to explain to every single person that her fashion and sexual preference were two separate entities.

Eventually, she and Jared had dated. He was easily 6'4. He played basketball and baseball and although he grew his hair out and worse skinny jeans and athletic shirts that hugged his curves just right, beside him Saxon Robison was a convincing enough 'girl'. He was popular and friendly and he dragged her along so that she could become close enough associates with his friends. Sabastian appreciated the fact that Jared looked out for her and Sarai adored him. Her parents appreciated that he balanced her. And well, Saxon appreciated that he was surrounded by a confusion that she recognized.

The first time that they kissed Jared had already graduate and started college and it was him that told her to take it slow because laid back Jared and overly forward Saxon were just that kind of combination.

Saxon placed her hands on his chest and he moved them away. She'd blushed. She'd felt like a little girl trying on her first bra, excited, but nervous and a little shaken up. The two of them didn't have sex that night, but they still laid beside each other in the darkness of her room, one of her hands holding one of hers as it twitched atop the covers. The next morning while she was in class, Jared folded her clothes and cleaned her room while her parents unknowingly simply went to work with him in her bed.

She slept to his house the day before her first day of high school after he'd already graduated. He baked her a three-layer cake and then woke up early the next morning to ice it and send pieces of it to school with her in a Tupperware Container. Saxon had watched his shirtless torso as he'd squeezed icing from a tube and she swore she had never seen anyone more beautiful.

The first day of Jared's sophomore year of school Saxon built him a model of a Harry Potter house because she knew that it was favorite book series. She chose the Hufflepuff house because that's exactly what Jared was. He was loyal and kind and he moved away from confrontation. House Hufflepuff was the house that produced the least percentage of evil wizards and she wrote him a three page letter explaining why she felt like that was the house he belonged to. She made a wooden figure of them both and she sat them outside of the Hufflepuff house, because her person, half his height in her Slytherin hoodie was just not meant to reside in a place so pure.

The day she graduated high school, he picked flowers on his way to see her cross the stage. He had four bouquets of roses sent to her house, one for each year that they'd known each other, in four different colors with handwritten notes explaining what the colors were for.

On Saxon's first day of college, Jared gave her a tour around campus and had no one to introduce her to because she already knew all of his friends. He took her to get coffee and when the guy behind the counter slid Jared his number she pretended not to notice.

And when he threw it in to the trash on their way out and threw his arm around her she was sure she would never get tired of the way he smelled like lilac.

That night while they sat around, their eyes on a show that Saxon wasn't even watching a mug of green tea in her hand, she turned to Jared and asked him if he ever thought about dating guys. She took a sip of her tea before setting it down and she held her breath as she placed a hand on his. Jared had taken a breath and he'd paused and they'd sat in silence for what felt like eternity and then, he'd turned to look at her and shrugged.

"I haven't met a guy I want to date yet," he'd said simply, "but right now I'm kind of in love with you," he scoffed and blushed, "I mean if that's okay with you," he blurted.

And Saxon had laughed and nodded and then they had slept together for the first time.

X

That had been four years ago. Saxon shook her head as if to clear it and she climbed in to her shower. The hot water hit her skin, untensing her muscles and making her lean her head back in bliss.

Since that time, the two of them had mutually parted.

She still loved Jared. She would always love him, but she didn't love him the way he deserved to be loved. They hid inside of each other, two people with similar insecurities, but they weren't in love. They were in comfort. Saxon considered Jared her first soulmate and he wore the title with pride. She believed in loving many different people in many different ways. She felt like it was possible to be in love with more than one person. She felt that different people came in to certain lives for different reasons to make others feel different things and strengthen different parts of their selves.

She had come to terms with being bisexual and Jared had held her hand through her self discovery, just like he'd held her hand through rehab. He had littered her dorm with notes of random memories, of things that he thought she would need to remember, of quotes and songs that could help her and each time he would visit, he would leave a sticky note somewhere for her to discover when she least expected it, on her shower handle, on the third row of her shoe rack, on her milk in the fridge, on the inside of her math book, on the ceiling above her bed so that when she'd collapsed she'd see it.

Saxon showered quickly, making sure to not wet her hair and climbed out quickly when she heard knocking at her door. She threw on a large shirt and her underwear before running to the door and yanking it open.

Jared smirked at her, a bag of food in one hand and a bottle of wine and a grocery store bag in the other.

She slid to the side and allowed him in and pushed the door shut. Jared walked straight to her living room and Saxon collected two wine glass and plates before going in to meet him. She set the glasses down as he popped open the wine and poured some in to them.

"Chinese," he said matter-of-factly, "You are welcome."

"Thank you," Saxon rolled her eyes with a smile and then walked over to her television to turn it on.

"Can we not watch something scary?" he called.

"Sure," Saxon dug around in her entertainment center for a romantic comedy and quickly threw it in to the DVD player, "Do you need a blanket?" she looked over his shoulder.

"Yes please," he was opening containers and sitting them on her end table.

She hopped up and headed to her hall closet to collect two blankets and then stopped by her room to grab her phone. She had text messages. Her eyes scanned over them and she responded to Sabastian's questions about her job and Sarai's stupid meme and then she paused at the last message.

 _Enjoy your movie._

Saxon tapped on the message and watched it illuminate her screen and before she could respond another message bubble appeared before her eyes. It was a simple three kissy faces appearing from the same number and Saxon squeezed her phone and simply stared at the message, sure that her knuckles were tuning white.

 **A/N: Thank you to all of the lovely people that read, review, follow and favorite my work. Thank you to the people that just breeze through! I wanted to establish Saxon and Jared closeness and history because it's going to play a pretty big role in the fic, but there will obviously be more J in the next chapter.**


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